“Many people are completely lost in something I call ‘the confidence gap.’ It’s that place we get stuck when fear gets in the way of our dreams and ambitions. You know you’re stuck in the confidence gap if you believe something like this: I can’t achieve my goals, perform at my peak, do the things I want to do, or behave like the person I want to be until I feel more confident.
Does this ring true for you?”
Russ Harris, Ph. D
Are you waiting to feel more confident before you take a step to do something that could improve the quality of your life?
In his book, The Confidence Gap, Russ Harris, Ph. D describes how most people are following the wrong rule of confidence. This is where we believe that we need to feel more confident in order to do the things that we want to do in our life.
I followed the wrong rule for far too long.
I’ve wanted to write and share the ideas and tools that I was finding as part of my research in my clinical psychology practice.
But I never felt ready.
I always thought that I needed to read one more book, take one more course, or get one more degree.
Then I’d feel confident and ready to start writing.
But sadly that imagined time never came.
By default I discovered what Russ Harris refers as the right rule which is:
“The actions of confidence come first; the feelings of confidence come later”.
It was only when I took the terrifying first step to submit a blog post, get feedback, get some training and lots and lots of practice, did I start becoming more confident.
But I definitely didn’t start feeling confident.
Are you stuck in the confidence gap? What are you putting off doing believing that you need to feel more confident first?
My recommendation: arm yourself with some great tools to manage your fear and get into action!
“If only you had more confidence, how would your life be different?” ~ Russ Harris